1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,920 One, two, three, four, five, six, 2 00:00:02,961 --> 00:00:04,379 shake it, dude. 3 00:00:25,776 --> 00:00:27,820 Cue the pulse to begin 4 00:00:36,662 --> 00:00:39,623 Cue the pulse to begin 5 00:00:40,458 --> 00:00:42,877 Cue the pulse to begin 6 00:00:44,086 --> 00:00:46,255 Cue the pulse to begin 7 00:00:52,470 --> 00:00:56,265 You obsess about it, you fantasize about it, 8 00:00:56,307 --> 00:00:58,351 but then when you finally hear the news... 9 00:00:58,392 --> 00:00:59,894 Take a deep breath. 10 00:01:01,521 --> 00:01:05,149 All you can think about is, "why me?" 11 00:01:05,191 --> 00:01:07,860 I mean, how could this happen? How... 12 00:01:07,902 --> 00:01:09,028 how could I... 13 00:01:10,071 --> 00:01:11,823 be negative? 14 00:01:11,823 --> 00:01:13,241 Luck of the Irish? 15 00:01:13,283 --> 00:01:14,867 Except I'm not Irish. 16 00:01:15,368 --> 00:01:16,578 Bobby, it's going to be okay. 17 00:01:20,415 --> 00:01:21,916 What's next? 18 00:01:23,293 --> 00:01:26,504 Ah. A job, I guess. 19 00:01:26,713 --> 00:01:27,756 I became quite adept at cleaning 20 00:01:27,797 --> 00:01:29,215 toilets back at rehab. 21 00:01:28,757 --> 00:01:31,134 Polished that porcelain so bright 22 00:01:31,176 --> 00:01:33,511 you could see your face before you puked. 23 00:01:34,637 --> 00:01:35,430 Let me ask you. 24 00:01:35,472 --> 00:01:39,059 If you could do anything in the world... 25 00:01:39,267 --> 00:01:40,852 what would it be? 26 00:01:41,728 --> 00:01:43,063 Well... 27 00:01:44,773 --> 00:01:46,441 Aw. You'll laugh. 28 00:01:46,566 --> 00:01:48,068 Come on. Try me. 29 00:01:49,945 --> 00:01:52,447 I always wanted to sing opera. 30 00:01:52,489 --> 00:01:55,575 Back in college, I even took some lessons. 31 00:01:55,617 --> 00:01:57,494 Instructor said I wasn't half bad. 32 00:01:57,536 --> 00:01:59,121 Of course, I was paying him. 33 00:01:59,162 --> 00:02:00,497 So sing. 34 00:02:00,706 --> 00:02:01,790 What, are you kidding? 35 00:02:01,832 --> 00:02:03,208 I mean, that was... that was just a dream. 36 00:02:03,208 --> 00:02:04,626 What I need is something practical. 37 00:02:04,668 --> 00:02:05,919 No, what you need is something you love. 38 00:02:05,961 --> 00:02:07,629 Something that'll make you feel good. 39 00:02:08,213 --> 00:02:10,549 So I've been going to the gym religiously. 40 00:02:10,966 --> 00:02:13,218 Is that why you were kneeling in the steam room? 41 00:02:13,218 --> 00:02:15,220 I've got to get back in shape. 42 00:02:15,262 --> 00:02:16,805 You look fine, Em. 43 00:02:16,847 --> 00:02:18,015 "Fine"? 44 00:02:18,015 --> 00:02:18,765 Just "fine"? 45 00:02:18,807 --> 00:02:22,644 "Fine" is fine for you two. You each have a husband. 46 00:02:22,686 --> 00:02:24,980 Wife? Partner? 47 00:02:25,481 --> 00:02:26,273 Passing acquaintance? 48 00:02:27,316 --> 00:02:29,026 Anyway, for those of us adrift on the sea of 49 00:02:29,026 --> 00:02:31,820 single-dom, it's "sparkle, neely, sparkle!" 50 00:02:32,613 --> 00:02:35,157 Shit. 51 00:02:35,407 --> 00:02:37,159 Shit. 52 00:02:54,135 --> 00:02:55,386 Come to think of it, I, uh... 53 00:02:55,428 --> 00:02:57,221 may do a little speed-walking. 54 00:02:57,263 --> 00:02:58,931 Burn off a couple of pounds. 55 00:03:01,767 --> 00:03:02,894 Ted! 56 00:03:02,935 --> 00:03:04,186 Michael. 57 00:03:04,353 --> 00:03:06,272 Brian. You remember Blake. 58 00:03:06,314 --> 00:03:07,440 Nice to see you guys. 59 00:03:07,523 --> 00:03:09,150 So, uh, how are you, uh... 60 00:03:09,192 --> 00:03:10,651 Doing? Great. 61 00:03:10,693 --> 00:03:11,402 Great. 62 00:03:11,444 --> 00:03:13,529 Well, uh, we should get together sometime. 63 00:03:13,529 --> 00:03:14,614 What do you say? 64 00:03:14,781 --> 00:03:15,698 Yeah, sure, sometime. 65 00:03:15,740 --> 00:03:16,616 Well, gotta go. 66 00:03:18,159 --> 00:03:19,327 Get going, yeah. 67 00:03:20,745 --> 00:03:22,830 Think he was acting kind of strange? 68 00:03:22,872 --> 00:03:24,499 For Theodore? No. 69 00:03:25,625 --> 00:03:27,460 Maybe he feels like we're judging him. 70 00:03:27,543 --> 00:03:29,254 I don't know about you, but I am. 71 00:03:33,091 --> 00:03:35,927 So, if we're going to have a recognizable force, 72 00:03:35,969 --> 00:03:37,971 we need to have a uniform appearance. 73 00:03:38,012 --> 00:03:38,930 Wouldn't our presence on the street be 74 00:03:38,930 --> 00:03:41,599 more effective if we were less noticeable? 75 00:03:41,724 --> 00:03:43,518 Well, what's the point of doing it 76 00:03:43,518 --> 00:03:44,519 if we don't get some attention? 77 00:03:44,561 --> 00:03:46,021 We need to look the part 78 00:03:46,062 --> 00:03:47,397 so they know not to fuck with us. 79 00:03:47,439 --> 00:03:48,648 Hey, Daphne. 80 00:03:48,690 --> 00:03:50,567 This is my roommate, Daphne. 81 00:03:51,818 --> 00:03:53,069 Daph, this is the group that I was telling you about, 82 00:03:53,111 --> 00:03:53,987 the pink posse. 83 00:03:54,029 --> 00:03:56,072 Ah, right. For a minute there, 84 00:03:56,114 --> 00:03:57,866 I thought you were enrolled in beauty school. 85 00:03:58,783 --> 00:04:00,452 Daphne and I started the gay-straight 86 00:04:00,493 --> 00:04:01,495 alliance at our high school. 87 00:04:01,745 --> 00:04:03,288 I was the straight half. 88 00:04:04,623 --> 00:04:05,207 Can I join? 89 00:04:05,373 --> 00:04:07,250 It's only for queers. 90 00:04:10,629 --> 00:04:13,006 I thought keeping the streets safe 91 00:04:13,048 --> 00:04:14,341 was everyone's concern. 92 00:04:16,426 --> 00:04:18,261 Well, huh. 93 00:04:18,303 --> 00:04:19,888 I guess I'll... 94 00:04:20,264 --> 00:04:21,765 grab a straight soda, and... 95 00:04:21,807 --> 00:04:25,060 head to my straight room 96 00:04:25,102 --> 00:04:27,771 and study my straight studies. 97 00:04:29,022 --> 00:04:30,274 She's my best friend. 98 00:04:30,315 --> 00:04:31,692 Why couldn't she be a part of this? 99 00:04:31,733 --> 00:04:34,111 Because this is about queers defending themselves. 100 00:04:34,611 --> 00:04:36,572 Queers standing up to their attackers. 101 00:04:36,613 --> 00:04:38,032 Queers fighting back. 102 00:04:38,073 --> 00:04:38,532 Right on! 103 00:04:38,574 --> 00:04:41,118 Let in heteros, it dissipates the purpose. 104 00:04:41,160 --> 00:04:41,660 Exactly. 105 00:04:41,702 --> 00:04:44,246 Now, we'll be patrolling in teams of two. 106 00:04:44,288 --> 00:04:44,997 It's you and me, dude. 107 00:04:45,039 --> 00:04:46,457 Dynamic duo. 108 00:04:46,624 --> 00:04:47,750 We'll work together. 109 00:04:48,292 --> 00:04:50,586 Okay, who's next? 110 00:04:50,628 --> 00:04:52,004 I am. 111 00:05:04,433 --> 00:05:06,852 Ted's one of my best friends but... 112 00:05:06,894 --> 00:05:08,270 it's like I hardly knew him at all. 113 00:05:08,312 --> 00:05:09,397 He... he was so distant. 114 00:05:09,438 --> 00:05:11,273 Oh, he's been that way to all of us. 115 00:05:11,315 --> 00:05:12,692 Here you go, sweetie. 116 00:05:12,733 --> 00:05:13,442 Thanks. 117 00:05:13,484 --> 00:05:14,568 I meant Gus. 118 00:05:14,610 --> 00:05:16,112 But you can have one too. 119 00:05:16,153 --> 00:05:18,114 Of course, I haven't exactly been there for him either. 120 00:05:18,155 --> 00:05:19,866 Hey, don't start blaming yourself. 121 00:05:19,907 --> 00:05:21,576 Ted's responsible for his own behaviour. 122 00:05:21,617 --> 00:05:22,660 He knows that. 123 00:05:22,702 --> 00:05:24,829 Still, he needs to know that we're there for him. 124 00:05:24,871 --> 00:05:26,873 Hell, we're making him cookies, aren't we? 125 00:05:27,415 --> 00:05:29,292 Hi, baby. 126 00:05:29,333 --> 00:05:31,252 Ix-nay on the Ed-tay. 127 00:05:31,252 --> 00:05:32,754 This is a nice surprise. 128 00:05:32,795 --> 00:05:33,880 What brings you to these parts? 129 00:05:34,297 --> 00:05:35,590 Just checking up on Mel. 130 00:05:35,757 --> 00:05:38,718 Hmm, seems like there's more than a bun in the oven. 131 00:05:38,968 --> 00:05:40,637 You realize, of course, I'm going to 132 00:05:40,678 --> 00:05:41,387 have to chain myself to the treadmill 133 00:05:41,429 --> 00:05:42,972 for a week after that. 134 00:05:44,349 --> 00:05:45,225 Make that two weeks. 135 00:05:45,266 --> 00:05:46,184 Actually, Em... 136 00:05:46,226 --> 00:05:46,559 we're making them for... 137 00:05:46,601 --> 00:05:47,769 for Ted. 138 00:05:54,734 --> 00:05:56,986 That's very thoughtful. 139 00:05:57,028 --> 00:06:00,490 I'm sure he'll appreciate knowing he has such good friends as you. 140 00:06:06,746 --> 00:06:09,249 This one has plenty of square footage, 141 00:06:09,291 --> 00:06:11,418 offices with excellent views, 142 00:06:11,459 --> 00:06:14,588 generous support areas including a conference room, 143 00:06:14,629 --> 00:06:18,133 uh, kitchen, uh, executive washroom, 144 00:06:18,175 --> 00:06:19,760 and plenty of underground parking. 145 00:06:19,801 --> 00:06:21,720 Sounds like everything I need, 146 00:06:21,762 --> 00:06:23,388 but it's not what I want. 147 00:06:24,723 --> 00:06:26,224 But it's as nice as Vangard. 148 00:06:26,266 --> 00:06:28,143 Kinnetik is not Vangard. 149 00:06:28,185 --> 00:06:31,605 We don't think in a box. We don't live in a box. 150 00:06:31,647 --> 00:06:33,065 Therefore, we don't work in a box. 151 00:06:33,231 --> 00:06:36,735 Even if that box were the Seagram's building, I don't want it. 152 00:06:39,530 --> 00:06:40,239 Hey. 153 00:06:40,864 --> 00:06:41,740 Christ! 154 00:06:42,491 --> 00:06:44,660 What did you do to your hair? 155 00:06:44,743 --> 00:06:46,578 It's called a haircut, mother. 156 00:06:47,162 --> 00:06:49,873 I'm... I'm... I'm... I'm just surprised, that's all. 157 00:06:49,915 --> 00:06:52,960 It used to be... so beautiful. 158 00:06:53,544 --> 00:06:55,671 Yeah well, maybe that was the problem. 159 00:06:55,713 --> 00:06:56,714 Anyway, we all got them. 160 00:06:56,755 --> 00:06:57,881 Who's "we"? 161 00:06:57,923 --> 00:06:58,841 The pink posse. 162 00:06:58,882 --> 00:07:00,801 We're protecting Liberty Avenue from homophobes. 163 00:07:00,801 --> 00:07:03,804 In case you weren't aware, there was a bashing. 164 00:07:03,804 --> 00:07:06,223 I'm perfectly aware. 165 00:07:06,265 --> 00:07:08,058 I'm also aware that you were bashed. 166 00:07:08,058 --> 00:07:09,518 All the more reason. 167 00:07:09,560 --> 00:07:10,853 To put yourself at risk? 168 00:07:10,853 --> 00:07:12,688 Haven't you been through enough? 169 00:07:12,730 --> 00:07:14,190 Don't fucking tell me what to do. 170 00:07:14,231 --> 00:07:15,733 Hey, hey, take it easy, Timberlake. 171 00:07:15,775 --> 00:07:19,070 Brian, will you please talk some sense into him? 172 00:07:19,070 --> 00:07:19,945 Now, now, Mother Taylor, 173 00:07:19,945 --> 00:07:20,821 Justin's a big boy. 174 00:07:20,821 --> 00:07:23,824 He should be allowed to make his own mistakes. 175 00:07:28,120 --> 00:07:29,705 I'll be in touch. 176 00:07:36,254 --> 00:07:39,173 Your haircut's hot. 177 00:08:23,593 --> 00:08:25,929 That was very nice. Thank you. 178 00:08:25,971 --> 00:08:27,472 We'll be in touch. 179 00:08:28,849 --> 00:08:30,267 Next! 180 00:08:31,059 --> 00:08:32,477 Thanks. Sorry. 181 00:08:34,563 --> 00:08:36,106 You are Ted Schmidt? 182 00:08:36,148 --> 00:08:38,275 Ah, yes, sir. Ted Schmidt. That's me. 183 00:08:38,316 --> 00:08:40,235 Care to tell me a little something about yourself, Ted? 184 00:08:40,277 --> 00:08:42,863 Ah, okay, ah, well, ah... 185 00:08:42,904 --> 00:08:44,656 born and raised right here in Pittsburgh, 186 00:08:44,698 --> 00:08:46,491 uh, went to North Allegheny High, 187 00:08:46,533 --> 00:08:48,744 uh, then to Wharton where I was in the top 10... 188 00:08:48,785 --> 00:08:51,330 I meant your singing experience. 189 00:08:51,371 --> 00:08:54,458 Oh. Uh, well... You know, I, uh, 190 00:08:54,500 --> 00:08:57,085 I mean, I've had, you know, a few voice lessons, 191 00:08:57,127 --> 00:09:00,047 and did some college and amateur productions, 192 00:09:00,088 --> 00:09:01,715 "Pinafore", "Penzance", things like that. 193 00:09:01,757 --> 00:09:02,633 I see. 194 00:09:02,674 --> 00:09:05,010 But I love opera. 195 00:09:05,052 --> 00:09:05,928 It's always been my dream to... 196 00:09:05,969 --> 00:09:07,513 So what are you going to sing for us today? 197 00:09:07,554 --> 00:09:09,515 Well, I thought I'd do, uh, 198 00:09:09,556 --> 00:09:11,433 "Che Gelida Manina" from "Boheme". 199 00:09:15,896 --> 00:09:19,275 Perhaps if you gave Oscar your music, 200 00:09:19,316 --> 00:09:21,902 he might play it while you sing. 201 00:09:25,322 --> 00:09:25,739 Oh. 202 00:09:26,615 --> 00:09:27,533 Of course. 203 00:09:27,575 --> 00:09:30,411 I'm sorry. Uh, yes. Uh, here you go, Oscar. 204 00:09:30,453 --> 00:09:32,038 From the top, I guess. 205 00:10:00,316 --> 00:10:01,776 Are you sure she's asleep? 206 00:10:03,027 --> 00:10:04,862 She's sawing enough wood down there 207 00:10:04,904 --> 00:10:07,115 to keep us warm all winter. 208 00:10:08,366 --> 00:10:10,034 Speaking of which, my feet are freezing. 209 00:10:10,451 --> 00:10:13,329 Warm them up, would you? 210 00:10:13,371 --> 00:10:15,165 You warm mine. 211 00:10:19,169 --> 00:10:20,336 Honey? 212 00:10:20,587 --> 00:10:21,379 I thought we were gonna watch 213 00:10:21,421 --> 00:10:23,757 "By Love Possessed" on AMC. 214 00:10:24,674 --> 00:10:26,051 Well, I thought you were asleep. 215 00:10:26,092 --> 00:10:28,887 I was just taking a catnap so I could stay up. Huh! 216 00:10:29,387 --> 00:10:31,556 You know, when I was younger, and a blonde, 217 00:10:31,598 --> 00:10:34,100 everybody said I reminded them of Lana Turner. 218 00:10:34,142 --> 00:10:35,477 It was Shelly Winters. 219 00:10:36,311 --> 00:10:38,355 It was Lana fucking Turner. 220 00:10:38,396 --> 00:10:40,398 She and I both had that perfect chin. 221 00:10:40,649 --> 00:10:41,733 And the tits. 222 00:10:41,816 --> 00:10:43,276 I've still got 'em. 223 00:10:45,237 --> 00:10:48,240 Anyway, I thought I'd, uh, heat up some those... 224 00:10:48,281 --> 00:10:49,616 those turnovers, you know, from the freezer. 225 00:10:49,658 --> 00:10:51,743 So what'll it be, apricot or cherry? 226 00:10:54,162 --> 00:10:55,539 Apricot. 227 00:10:55,664 --> 00:10:56,623 Rodney? 228 00:10:58,500 --> 00:10:59,334 Cherry. 229 00:10:59,376 --> 00:11:01,795 I'll drizzle extra icing on 'em. 230 00:11:06,383 --> 00:11:07,551 Well, you coming? 231 00:11:07,676 --> 00:11:08,594 You know, actually, Debbie... 232 00:11:08,635 --> 00:11:10,179 Could you give us a minute, sis? 233 00:11:10,304 --> 00:11:11,555 Sure, honey. Take your time. 234 00:11:16,351 --> 00:11:18,896 Say, you weren't gonna fuck or anything, were you? 235 00:11:27,071 --> 00:11:29,156 Something tells me the temperature tonight 236 00:11:29,198 --> 00:11:30,824 is going to hit record lows. 237 00:11:30,866 --> 00:11:32,576 What makes you say that? 238 00:11:32,618 --> 00:11:34,537 'Cause I'm already feeling a chill, 239 00:11:34,578 --> 00:11:36,914 and it's coming from your side of the bed. 240 00:11:37,248 --> 00:11:39,458 She never leaves us alone. 241 00:11:39,500 --> 00:11:39,959 I thought that when we got together, 242 00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:43,045 we were going to be a couple, not a threesome. 243 00:11:43,087 --> 00:11:44,463 What can I do? It's her house. 244 00:11:44,505 --> 00:11:45,881 It's your room. 245 00:11:45,923 --> 00:11:47,883 Well, it's not much better at your place, 246 00:11:47,925 --> 00:11:49,844 with your three roommates running around. 247 00:11:52,388 --> 00:11:54,265 So I guess we can never be alone. 248 00:11:56,726 --> 00:11:58,728 We're alone now. 249 00:12:02,523 --> 00:12:05,568 Vic! Rodney! It's on! 250 00:12:13,785 --> 00:12:14,494 Teddy. 251 00:12:14,535 --> 00:12:15,578 Michael. 252 00:12:15,620 --> 00:12:17,246 I come bearing cookies. 253 00:12:17,246 --> 00:12:19,958 Actually, they're from Mel and Linz, chocolate chippers, but... 254 00:12:19,958 --> 00:12:21,834 Gus and I were the official taste testers. 255 00:12:21,876 --> 00:12:23,086 That's nice. 256 00:12:23,127 --> 00:12:25,004 Um, what do you say we crack open the tin 257 00:12:25,046 --> 00:12:26,589 and eat 'em all in one sitting? 258 00:12:26,631 --> 00:12:28,258 Well, as much as I'd like to O.D. on chocolate... 259 00:12:28,299 --> 00:12:29,592 For a change. 260 00:12:29,634 --> 00:12:30,969 I mean... 261 00:12:31,010 --> 00:12:34,139 I'm just on my way out to a meeting. 262 00:12:34,180 --> 00:12:35,640 Oh, new job? 263 00:12:36,307 --> 00:12:36,766 Not that kind of meeting. 264 00:12:36,808 --> 00:12:38,184 It's my 12-step. 265 00:12:38,226 --> 00:12:40,979 Oh. Well, um, 266 00:12:41,021 --> 00:12:43,189 how about dinner? You can meet Hunter. 267 00:12:43,231 --> 00:12:44,774 All right, yeah, Mel and Linz told me... 268 00:12:44,816 --> 00:12:46,026 Yeah. He's a great kid 269 00:12:46,067 --> 00:12:48,361 when he's not being a royal pain in the ass. But, uh, 270 00:12:48,403 --> 00:12:50,238 he's funny. I think you'll like him. 271 00:12:50,280 --> 00:12:50,864 I'm sure. 272 00:12:50,906 --> 00:12:54,117 So, say around 7:00, our place? 273 00:12:54,159 --> 00:12:57,162 Uh, well, I've got my group at rehab tonight. 274 00:12:57,204 --> 00:12:59,039 Well, what about tomorrow? Or the next day? 275 00:12:59,080 --> 00:13:02,125 Breakfast, lunch, dinner, between-meal snacks, 276 00:13:02,167 --> 00:13:04,920 whatever you say. 277 00:13:06,004 --> 00:13:07,297 I'm kind of busy 278 00:13:07,339 --> 00:13:09,341 these days, what with, you know, 279 00:13:09,383 --> 00:13:14,554 my meetings, and looking for work, and my therapy. 280 00:13:22,354 --> 00:13:25,107 Ted, I just want you to know that I'm your friend. 281 00:13:26,233 --> 00:13:29,278 And I was your friend before this happened, 282 00:13:29,319 --> 00:13:31,530 and I'm your friend now. 283 00:13:34,116 --> 00:13:37,786 And, uh, I'll be here for you if you ever need anything. 284 00:13:38,329 --> 00:13:40,623 No matter what. 285 00:14:01,394 --> 00:14:04,814 Is that what the well-dressed vigilante will be wearing this season? 286 00:14:05,022 --> 00:14:07,316 Cody says it's important we be recognizable. 287 00:14:07,733 --> 00:14:10,945 Hmm, well, you'll be recognizable, all right. 288 00:14:10,987 --> 00:14:14,240 So, uh, what weapon are you packing? 289 00:14:14,282 --> 00:14:15,491 The howitzer or bazooka? 290 00:14:15,533 --> 00:14:18,161 Pepper spray. 291 00:14:23,207 --> 00:14:26,085 Whoo. Armed and ready for action. 292 00:14:26,127 --> 00:14:29,714 This Cody's thought of everything. 293 00:14:29,756 --> 00:14:33,217 I remember when my mother used to refer to you as "This Brian". 294 00:14:35,261 --> 00:14:36,804 Well, your mom's no fool. 295 00:14:36,846 --> 00:14:38,014 She knew her little angel was getting 296 00:14:38,056 --> 00:14:40,391 himself into a peck of trouble. 297 00:14:40,517 --> 00:14:42,852 She's not wrong this time. 298 00:14:42,894 --> 00:14:44,646 You should really go back to school. 299 00:14:44,813 --> 00:14:46,147 Fuck school. 300 00:14:46,731 --> 00:14:49,275 They kicked me out for doing what was right. 301 00:14:49,317 --> 00:14:50,652 I don't need them or their diploma. 302 00:14:50,693 --> 00:14:51,820 They can eat shit. 303 00:14:52,987 --> 00:14:54,072 Still angry? 304 00:14:54,406 --> 00:14:56,032 I'm not angry, I'm committed. 305 00:14:56,116 --> 00:14:58,493 What, to saving the world? 306 00:14:58,535 --> 00:15:00,537 You saved the world from an evil politician. 307 00:15:00,578 --> 00:15:02,205 I didn't do it for the world. 308 00:15:03,248 --> 00:15:04,916 Stockwell closed down the back room, 309 00:15:04,958 --> 00:15:06,960 forced us to fuck like boring breeders. So... 310 00:15:07,002 --> 00:15:10,463 don't start mistaking me for Eleanor Roosevelt. 311 00:15:10,505 --> 00:15:12,966 I just did what I had to do, for me. 312 00:15:13,008 --> 00:15:15,385 And I'm doing what I have to do, for me. 313 00:15:34,655 --> 00:15:36,824 What are you doing reading comic books? 314 00:15:36,865 --> 00:15:39,576 Duh! I'm in a fucking comic book store. 315 00:15:39,618 --> 00:15:41,745 Well, you should be doing your homework. 316 00:15:41,787 --> 00:15:43,038 And watch your mouth. 317 00:15:45,124 --> 00:15:46,583 Holy shit. 318 00:15:46,625 --> 00:15:48,669 What? What's the matter? 319 00:15:48,711 --> 00:15:49,461 Did you hear me? 320 00:15:49,503 --> 00:15:50,879 I sounded just like my mother. 321 00:15:52,589 --> 00:15:54,800 Here. Read as many as you like. 322 00:15:55,926 --> 00:15:57,636 Hey, Uncle Vic. 323 00:15:57,678 --> 00:15:58,971 Hi, Michael. 324 00:15:59,013 --> 00:16:00,764 Hey, how's it going, Hunter? 325 00:16:02,141 --> 00:16:04,435 As an older gay man in this world, 326 00:16:04,435 --> 00:16:05,853 you might as well be invisible. 327 00:16:05,853 --> 00:16:07,062 He's just doing his homework. 328 00:16:07,646 --> 00:16:08,898 I don't fucking get algebra. 329 00:16:08,939 --> 00:16:10,024 Here, let's see. 330 00:16:11,400 --> 00:16:14,278 Make "x" equal to "y", then square it, 331 00:16:14,320 --> 00:16:16,238 and you've got your solution. 332 00:16:16,739 --> 00:16:17,782 Ah, I get it. 333 00:16:18,199 --> 00:16:19,450 Awesome! 334 00:16:19,492 --> 00:16:21,285 I was always good at numbers. 335 00:16:21,869 --> 00:16:24,121 Especially cute ones. 336 00:16:24,205 --> 00:16:26,916 You can always count on Uncle Vic to solve a problem. 337 00:16:26,958 --> 00:16:28,209 Except my own. 338 00:16:28,835 --> 00:16:30,962 Do you think Rage could help me? 339 00:16:31,003 --> 00:16:33,589 There's somebody you want brought back to life with a blow-job? 340 00:16:33,631 --> 00:16:36,843 Me. But every time Rodney and I try to... 341 00:16:37,093 --> 00:16:37,844 Fuck? 342 00:16:37,885 --> 00:16:39,387 Thank you. Your mother... 343 00:16:39,429 --> 00:16:40,722 Oh, say no more. 344 00:16:40,763 --> 00:16:42,140 She won't leave us alone. 345 00:16:42,181 --> 00:16:44,350 We'd like it to be the two of us, 346 00:16:44,392 --> 00:16:46,811 but instead, it's always the three of us. 347 00:16:46,811 --> 00:16:48,521 Easy solution, dude. 348 00:16:48,563 --> 00:16:51,274 Subtract one from three and you've got your problem solved. 349 00:16:51,316 --> 00:16:52,692 Smart ass. 350 00:16:52,734 --> 00:16:54,527 Well, oddly enough, that was Rodney's solution too. 351 00:16:54,569 --> 00:16:56,821 But Debbie and I've lived together for so long, hell, 352 00:16:56,863 --> 00:16:59,866 we'd be an old married couple if we weren't brother and sister. 353 00:16:59,908 --> 00:17:02,368 Besides, it would break her heart if I moved out. 354 00:17:03,411 --> 00:17:05,038 And after all she's done for me. 355 00:17:05,080 --> 00:17:08,291 I probably wouldn't even be alive if it wasn't for her. 356 00:17:08,333 --> 00:17:09,918 She helped you get your life back 357 00:17:09,959 --> 00:17:12,087 so that you could have a life. 358 00:17:12,253 --> 00:17:14,714 You're entitled to that, Uncle Vic. 359 00:17:14,756 --> 00:17:17,133 I'm sure she would be the first to say so. 360 00:17:23,557 --> 00:17:25,225 Surprisingly moist... 361 00:17:25,267 --> 00:17:27,477 for lesbian-baked goods. 362 00:17:29,146 --> 00:17:31,189 You know you're lucky to have such... 363 00:17:31,231 --> 00:17:32,607 good friends. 364 00:17:33,233 --> 00:17:34,484 Yeah. 365 00:17:37,863 --> 00:17:39,406 Well, 366 00:17:39,448 --> 00:17:42,075 I guess I'd better figure out how I'm going to support myself, 367 00:17:42,117 --> 00:17:44,286 considering I'm down to my last crumb. 368 00:17:50,375 --> 00:17:51,084 What? 369 00:17:51,126 --> 00:17:52,836 Can you believe I actually thought 370 00:17:52,878 --> 00:17:54,296 I could get a job singing? 371 00:17:55,047 --> 00:17:56,173 Those people at the audition 372 00:17:56,215 --> 00:17:58,217 must've had a good laugh after I left. 373 00:17:59,134 --> 00:18:00,886 As if anyone would hire me. 374 00:18:00,928 --> 00:18:03,180 I remember hearing you in the shower. 375 00:18:03,263 --> 00:18:05,182 You sounded pretty good. 376 00:18:05,349 --> 00:18:08,727 Everyone sounds good in the shower. 377 00:18:09,019 --> 00:18:12,773 It's time I put all those romantic notions behind me 378 00:18:12,815 --> 00:18:14,525 and get real. 379 00:18:24,869 --> 00:18:27,163 Aren't you going to answer that? 380 00:18:28,247 --> 00:18:31,125 No. It's probably just Michael wanting to do something. 381 00:18:31,167 --> 00:18:34,337 Remember we talked about avoidance in group? 382 00:18:45,556 --> 00:18:47,266 Hello? 383 00:18:47,975 --> 00:18:48,768 Yes? 384 00:18:49,060 --> 00:18:51,145 What? 385 00:18:52,814 --> 00:18:54,440 Are you sure? I-I mean... yes! 386 00:18:55,274 --> 00:18:56,234 That's great! 387 00:18:57,986 --> 00:18:58,945 Thank you. 388 00:19:00,613 --> 00:19:02,740 Michael must want to do something great. 389 00:19:02,949 --> 00:19:04,867 He wants me to sing. 390 00:19:05,159 --> 00:19:06,828 Not Michael, I mean... 391 00:19:07,996 --> 00:19:09,497 I got the job. 392 00:19:09,581 --> 00:19:10,874 Oh my god. 393 00:19:12,167 --> 00:19:13,001 That's... 394 00:19:13,042 --> 00:19:16,379 unbelievable? Insane? A mistake? 395 00:19:16,504 --> 00:19:17,964 It's wonderful! 396 00:19:22,761 --> 00:19:24,929 Save any lives last night? 397 00:19:25,013 --> 00:19:26,723 Oh, we helped some fucked-up club kids 398 00:19:26,765 --> 00:19:28,016 get back to their apartment, 399 00:19:28,058 --> 00:19:29,768 an old queen change a flat. 400 00:19:29,809 --> 00:19:31,770 Other than that, it's pretty quiet. 401 00:19:31,811 --> 00:19:34,231 Yeah well, that's the thing about being a superhero. 402 00:19:34,272 --> 00:19:36,107 The average person thinks it's all about 403 00:19:36,149 --> 00:19:37,984 stopping two planets from colliding or... 404 00:19:38,026 --> 00:19:41,279 saving the universe from being swallowed by a black hole. 405 00:19:41,321 --> 00:19:42,948 But most days, it's just your average 406 00:19:42,989 --> 00:19:45,367 run-of-the-mill good deeds. 407 00:19:45,409 --> 00:19:46,743 This is where I get off. 408 00:19:46,952 --> 00:19:48,787 It's a little early in the day, isn't it? 409 00:19:50,497 --> 00:19:51,289 No. 410 00:20:25,616 --> 00:20:28,202 This more what you're looking for? 411 00:20:30,079 --> 00:20:31,580 I've always dreamed 412 00:20:31,622 --> 00:20:34,208 of having an office with a drain in the floor. 413 00:20:34,250 --> 00:20:35,501 I thought you might like it. 414 00:20:36,585 --> 00:20:38,754 Come on. I'll show you around. 415 00:21:38,273 --> 00:21:40,233 I miss the old orgy room. 416 00:21:40,275 --> 00:21:41,860 You could make it a conference room. 417 00:21:41,901 --> 00:21:43,695 It's perfect... 418 00:21:43,737 --> 00:21:45,697 for screwing the competition. 419 00:22:26,447 --> 00:22:27,614 Bravo! 420 00:22:27,656 --> 00:22:28,907 Thank you. Thank you. 421 00:22:29,992 --> 00:22:31,493 Something in your spaghetti? 422 00:22:31,493 --> 00:22:34,371 Do you know who the singing waiter is? It's... 423 00:22:34,413 --> 00:22:35,372 Schmidt! 424 00:22:35,414 --> 00:22:37,041 Yes, Mr. Parducci? 425 00:22:37,082 --> 00:22:38,667 Table three needs more breadsticks. 426 00:22:38,709 --> 00:22:39,418 Right away, sir. 427 00:22:39,460 --> 00:22:40,544 Oh and, Schmidt, 428 00:22:40,586 --> 00:22:42,880 that was a very nice "Pagliacci". 429 00:22:43,339 --> 00:22:44,799 Oh, thank you, Mr. Parducci. 430 00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:47,051 I thought it would go well with scampi and a valpolicella. 431 00:22:47,092 --> 00:22:48,969 Excellent choice. 432 00:22:51,847 --> 00:22:53,099 Ted, a singing waiter? 433 00:22:53,140 --> 00:22:55,685 He's serving up arias and arrabbiata at Rigoletto's. 434 00:22:55,768 --> 00:22:57,645 I always heard that place is a blast. 435 00:22:57,687 --> 00:22:59,855 Oh, honey, it's like a goddamn ride at Disneyland. 436 00:22:59,897 --> 00:23:01,148 They got fake grapes, 437 00:23:01,190 --> 00:23:02,525 fake Italian waiters, 438 00:23:02,566 --> 00:23:04,735 fake sunsets painted on the walls. 439 00:23:05,152 --> 00:23:06,904 No fuckin' class at all. 440 00:23:06,946 --> 00:23:09,574 Huh. Then what were Vic and Rodney doing there? 441 00:23:09,615 --> 00:23:10,992 Vic and Rodney? 442 00:23:11,200 --> 00:23:12,785 At Rigoletto's? 443 00:23:12,994 --> 00:23:14,996 Last night. That's how we heard about Ted. 444 00:23:15,037 --> 00:23:17,081 We were supposed to go to the Grand Pricks last night. 445 00:23:17,790 --> 00:23:20,418 It's that big-dick contest at babylon, not the car race. 446 00:23:20,460 --> 00:23:21,335 We know, ma. 447 00:23:21,377 --> 00:23:23,379 But Vic said that... 448 00:23:23,421 --> 00:23:25,131 that... Rodney wasn't feeling well. 449 00:23:25,173 --> 00:23:26,382 Hi, boys. 450 00:23:26,424 --> 00:23:27,300 Hey, Em. 451 00:23:28,468 --> 00:23:30,678 You know, we should all go there for dinner. 452 00:23:30,720 --> 00:23:31,429 You sure he'd like that? 453 00:23:31,512 --> 00:23:32,263 Why not? 454 00:23:32,305 --> 00:23:33,097 Go where? 455 00:23:33,139 --> 00:23:34,057 Rigoletto's. 456 00:23:34,599 --> 00:23:37,352 That cheesy joint with the singing waiters? 457 00:23:37,393 --> 00:23:38,311 Why would we want to go there? 458 00:23:38,353 --> 00:23:40,105 Ted's one of the singing waiters. 459 00:23:41,689 --> 00:23:42,982 Really? 460 00:23:44,401 --> 00:23:48,113 So you just, uh, figured we'd all go and root him on? 461 00:23:50,073 --> 00:23:53,952 Huh. Well, be sure and shout "bravo" for me. 462 00:23:56,204 --> 00:23:58,540 Em, would you slow down? 463 00:23:59,165 --> 00:24:00,959 What are you getting so upset for? 464 00:24:01,001 --> 00:24:02,878 I'm just trying to show Ted a little support. 465 00:24:02,919 --> 00:24:05,130 Well, I'm getting a little tired of your little support. 466 00:24:05,172 --> 00:24:06,089 Cookies are one thing. 467 00:24:06,131 --> 00:24:07,507 Now you're his cheering section? 468 00:24:07,549 --> 00:24:08,884 He's my friend. 469 00:24:08,925 --> 00:24:11,011 In case you've forgotten, so am I. 470 00:24:11,053 --> 00:24:11,803 I know that. 471 00:24:11,845 --> 00:24:14,222 Then you might try considering how I feel. 472 00:24:14,264 --> 00:24:16,683 What does my friendship with him have to do with you? 473 00:24:16,767 --> 00:24:18,602 How can you even say that to me 474 00:24:18,644 --> 00:24:19,895 after what he put me through? 475 00:24:20,812 --> 00:24:22,731 That's between the two of you. 476 00:24:22,773 --> 00:24:24,858 Besides, I can't very well turn my back on him. 477 00:24:24,900 --> 00:24:26,985 Why not? He turned his back on you. 478 00:24:27,027 --> 00:24:28,779 Well, that doesn't mean I should do the same. 479 00:24:28,820 --> 00:24:29,696 It wouldn't be fair. 480 00:24:29,738 --> 00:24:30,948 "Fair"? 481 00:24:31,907 --> 00:24:33,784 What about being fair to me? 482 00:24:33,826 --> 00:24:36,662 Why should I be fair to him or anyone else? 483 00:24:41,709 --> 00:24:42,876 Vic! 484 00:24:42,918 --> 00:24:45,671 Get your ass down here. We're gonna miss the movie. 485 00:24:46,630 --> 00:24:48,591 Why didn't you bring a sweater? You know it's chilly. 486 00:24:48,632 --> 00:24:50,259 Now go back upstairs, get your sweater. 487 00:24:50,301 --> 00:24:51,844 Did you remember your wallet? Last time you forgot it. 488 00:24:51,886 --> 00:24:54,680 Sis, do you mind if we skip the movie? 489 00:24:54,972 --> 00:24:57,183 What's the matter? Aren't you feeling well? 490 00:24:57,224 --> 00:24:57,683 I'm fine. 491 00:24:57,725 --> 00:24:59,310 I just thought since it's 492 00:24:59,351 --> 00:25:01,479 Rodney's night to volunteer at the hospice, 493 00:25:01,520 --> 00:25:03,814 you and I could spend the evening at home. 494 00:25:04,482 --> 00:25:06,317 Just the two of us. 495 00:25:07,109 --> 00:25:08,361 Just the two of us? 496 00:25:08,402 --> 00:25:10,154 We haven't done that in a long time. 497 00:25:10,196 --> 00:25:11,614 Wanna play cards? 498 00:25:11,739 --> 00:25:13,407 I'll make us some caramel corn. 499 00:25:13,449 --> 00:25:15,284 Maybe later. Sis... 500 00:25:27,547 --> 00:25:28,840 Baby, what is it? 501 00:25:29,257 --> 00:25:31,592 You know I love you. 502 00:25:31,718 --> 00:25:33,636 More than anyone else in the world. 503 00:25:33,678 --> 00:25:36,097 Except Rodney. But I understand that. 504 00:25:36,139 --> 00:25:38,141 Then I hope you'll understand that... 505 00:25:38,182 --> 00:25:40,768 we've talked things over and... 506 00:25:40,810 --> 00:25:43,605 we've decided to get our own place. 507 00:25:45,940 --> 00:25:48,026 It's time, sis. 508 00:25:53,615 --> 00:25:55,825 You're damn fuckin' right it's time. 509 00:25:56,326 --> 00:25:58,912 Hell, I've been waiting for this for god knows how long. 510 00:25:59,037 --> 00:26:01,581 Not that I don't love having you here. 511 00:26:01,623 --> 00:26:02,916 And not that I'm not crazy about Rodney. 512 00:26:02,957 --> 00:26:04,250 But I never have any privacy. 513 00:26:04,292 --> 00:26:07,087 I have to close the door every time I want to go potty 514 00:26:07,128 --> 00:26:09,047 and I can't run down here to the refrigerator in my panties. 515 00:26:09,089 --> 00:26:11,341 You do anyway. We've seen you. 516 00:26:11,508 --> 00:26:13,677 Well, now I can do it with nobody watching. 517 00:26:15,345 --> 00:26:17,264 So when are you going? 518 00:26:17,305 --> 00:26:20,142 Well, since it's making you so happy, I could go right now. 519 00:26:20,183 --> 00:26:21,184 No! No. 520 00:26:21,226 --> 00:26:22,352 Not till we play cards. 521 00:26:22,436 --> 00:26:23,854 Oh, get off me now. 522 00:26:23,895 --> 00:26:25,355 Say "auntie"! 523 00:26:25,397 --> 00:26:26,940 Auntie, auntie... 524 00:26:27,941 --> 00:26:30,193 I could always pin you down. 525 00:26:30,235 --> 00:26:32,195 You're the top in this family. 526 00:26:32,237 --> 00:26:32,821 You bet. 527 00:26:33,405 --> 00:26:34,364 You get the cards. 528 00:26:35,324 --> 00:26:37,242 I'll make the caramel corn. 529 00:26:37,284 --> 00:26:38,243 And, honey? 530 00:26:39,536 --> 00:26:41,413 Don't you dare worry about me. 531 00:26:41,455 --> 00:26:42,998 I'll be just fine. 532 00:26:56,595 --> 00:26:59,890 Mmm! This chianti tastes like piss. 533 00:26:59,974 --> 00:27:03,936 This pasta's so limp, it needs Viagra sauce. 534 00:27:04,019 --> 00:27:05,688 It doesn't matter if the food's good or not. 535 00:27:05,729 --> 00:27:06,772 We're here to support Ted. 536 00:27:06,814 --> 00:27:07,481 So where is Teddy? 537 00:27:07,523 --> 00:27:08,899 Are you sure he's working tonight? 538 00:27:09,775 --> 00:27:11,193 Ladies and gentlemen, 539 00:27:11,235 --> 00:27:14,280 signore and signori, 540 00:27:14,321 --> 00:27:17,575 we hope you are having a memorable dining experience. 541 00:27:17,616 --> 00:27:19,702 I'm sure I'll remember the indigestion. 542 00:27:19,744 --> 00:27:22,204 And, to add to your enjoyment... 543 00:27:22,913 --> 00:27:24,957 Signore Schmidt! 544 00:27:29,962 --> 00:27:31,047 Thanks 545 00:27:32,798 --> 00:27:34,467 Thank you. 546 00:27:57,365 --> 00:27:59,033 I'm sorry, I-I can't. 547 00:28:04,205 --> 00:28:05,832 Teddy, what's wrong? 548 00:28:05,874 --> 00:28:06,791 Why are you here? 549 00:28:06,875 --> 00:28:08,334 To cheer you on. 550 00:28:08,376 --> 00:28:09,627 Did it ever occur to you, 551 00:28:09,669 --> 00:28:10,628 to any of you, 552 00:28:10,670 --> 00:28:12,714 that if I wanted you here, I would have asked you? 553 00:28:12,756 --> 00:28:15,967 And if you were really my friends, you would leave me alone. 554 00:28:16,009 --> 00:28:18,928 Waiter, can I get some more breadsticks? 555 00:28:18,970 --> 00:28:20,263 Right away, ma'am. 556 00:28:49,710 --> 00:28:51,295 Hey, faggot! 557 00:28:51,378 --> 00:28:53,297 Wanna suck my cock? 558 00:28:55,007 --> 00:28:56,216 Assholes. 559 00:28:56,341 --> 00:28:57,426 Come on. 560 00:28:58,927 --> 00:29:00,554 Motherfuckers! 561 00:29:00,596 --> 00:29:03,015 Who do you think you are, calling people faggot? 562 00:29:03,056 --> 00:29:04,308 Get out of the car! 563 00:29:04,892 --> 00:29:07,311 Get out of the fucking car. 564 00:29:07,353 --> 00:29:08,312 Hey! What are you doing? 565 00:29:09,188 --> 00:29:11,398 Look what you did to my fucking car, you asshole. 566 00:29:11,440 --> 00:29:12,775 How would you like me to do the same thing to you? 567 00:29:12,816 --> 00:29:13,734 You and who else, faggot? 568 00:29:13,776 --> 00:29:14,902 The other faggot. 569 00:29:15,527 --> 00:29:16,904 Apologize. You too. 570 00:29:16,946 --> 00:29:18,614 Hey, fuck you, you little cocksucker. 571 00:29:27,873 --> 00:29:30,209 Now you can get your cock sucked. 572 00:29:30,251 --> 00:29:31,919 And you can do it for him. 573 00:30:23,179 --> 00:30:25,223 Ah, you're just in time. 574 00:30:26,850 --> 00:30:28,435 I was about to go out to Babylon. 575 00:30:28,476 --> 00:30:30,228 These fucking straight assholes; 576 00:30:30,770 --> 00:30:32,522 we turned them into pussies. 577 00:30:33,356 --> 00:30:34,774 You should've seen us there. 578 00:31:29,330 --> 00:31:31,206 Good boy! 579 00:31:31,248 --> 00:31:33,083 Feel those pecs. 580 00:31:33,125 --> 00:31:35,211 Anytime you want, big guy. 581 00:31:36,670 --> 00:31:39,340 Excuse me, but would you mind spotting me? 582 00:31:39,381 --> 00:31:42,051 Uh, actually, we were just about to hit the showers. 583 00:31:42,093 --> 00:31:43,135 I'm Blake. 584 00:31:43,177 --> 00:31:44,095 Ben. 585 00:31:44,178 --> 00:31:46,680 Oh, you're, uh, Ted's... 586 00:31:46,722 --> 00:31:48,516 Michael's told me... 587 00:31:48,557 --> 00:31:49,767 The whole story? 588 00:31:49,809 --> 00:31:51,185 Come on. We need to get home. 589 00:31:51,227 --> 00:31:52,687 Uh, look. 590 00:31:52,728 --> 00:31:55,856 Uh, I know you don't really want to hear anything I have to say, 591 00:31:55,898 --> 00:31:58,442 but what happened last night between you and Ted, uh... 592 00:31:58,526 --> 00:32:00,611 You've got to give him some time. 593 00:32:00,653 --> 00:32:02,947 Thanks for the advice. Now, if you don't mind... 594 00:32:02,989 --> 00:32:05,616 He's trying to put his life back together. 595 00:32:05,658 --> 00:32:08,244 And there's a lot of things that he's ashamed of. 596 00:32:08,286 --> 00:32:10,037 And when he sees you, he's reminded of them. 597 00:32:10,079 --> 00:32:13,166 You're a reflection of those things that he wants to forget. 598 00:32:13,207 --> 00:32:15,001 I-It doesn't mean that he doesn't care about you. 599 00:32:15,043 --> 00:32:16,711 We care about him too. 600 00:32:16,753 --> 00:32:18,463 Yeah, we just want him to know it. 601 00:32:18,504 --> 00:32:21,132 He does know it, deep down. 602 00:32:21,507 --> 00:32:23,551 Eventually, he'll come around. 603 00:32:23,593 --> 00:32:26,095 But it has to be on his own terms. 604 00:32:32,268 --> 00:32:34,604 I'll spot you, if you like. 605 00:32:36,439 --> 00:32:37,982 - Thanks. - Sure. 606 00:32:40,694 --> 00:32:42,070 Guess this is everything. 607 00:32:42,112 --> 00:32:43,488 You ready? 608 00:32:43,530 --> 00:32:45,156 Vic! 609 00:32:45,198 --> 00:32:47,117 I'm down here, sis. 610 00:32:47,158 --> 00:32:49,244 I'll be there in a minute. 611 00:32:48,952 --> 00:32:51,496 Take your time. I'm going to put this in the car. 612 00:32:53,123 --> 00:32:54,082 Aren't you going to take the twins? 613 00:32:55,083 --> 00:32:56,751 I thought I'd leave them for you. 614 00:32:56,751 --> 00:32:58,837 But I bought them for you, remember? 615 00:32:58,879 --> 00:33:00,130 Of course I remember. 616 00:33:00,172 --> 00:33:02,048 You were so sick you couldn't get out of bed. 617 00:33:02,090 --> 00:33:04,384 So I put one on either side, to watch over you. 618 00:33:04,426 --> 00:33:06,178 And they did. 619 00:33:06,219 --> 00:33:07,429 Tell you what. 620 00:33:07,471 --> 00:33:09,639 I'll take her, you keep him. 621 00:33:09,681 --> 00:33:11,808 That way, we have each other. 622 00:33:12,559 --> 00:33:14,269 Deal. 623 00:33:15,562 --> 00:33:16,813 So, you got everything? 624 00:33:17,439 --> 00:33:18,273 Yeah. 625 00:33:20,776 --> 00:33:22,319 Wait a minute. 626 00:33:24,279 --> 00:33:25,322 Don't forget. 627 00:33:25,364 --> 00:33:29,284 There's a baked ziti, lasagne, a couple of chickens, a pound cake. 628 00:33:29,326 --> 00:33:30,994 Jesus, it's enough for an army. 629 00:33:31,036 --> 00:33:33,872 Well, you can't go to a new place without food in your fridge. 630 00:33:37,334 --> 00:33:39,920 Hey, it's not like you're never coming back. 631 00:33:40,754 --> 00:33:44,425 I just always thought that the only way I'd leave here would be... 632 00:33:44,633 --> 00:33:46,510 in a box. 633 00:33:46,635 --> 00:33:51,223 Well, thank Jesus, Mary and Joseph that never happened. 634 00:33:51,265 --> 00:33:53,350 Now you're walking out the front door 635 00:33:53,392 --> 00:33:56,896 with your boyfriend, and you're starting a whole new life. 636 00:33:56,896 --> 00:33:58,981 Hmm. What about you? 637 00:33:59,398 --> 00:34:01,233 Well, in case you haven't noticed, 638 00:34:01,275 --> 00:34:04,320 I'm all set up for my Rosalind Russell film festival. 639 00:34:04,362 --> 00:34:06,072 And I've got enough ice cream in the freezer 640 00:34:06,113 --> 00:34:08,741 to give every man, woman and child in Pittsburgh a heart attack. 641 00:34:09,659 --> 00:34:13,496 So, as soon as you leave, then my new life begins. 642 00:34:13,538 --> 00:34:14,872 I'm throwing off all my clothes, 643 00:34:14,914 --> 00:34:16,207 I'm gonna dive onto the couch, 644 00:34:16,249 --> 00:34:17,500 and I'm never looking back. 645 00:34:17,708 --> 00:34:20,419 And neither should you. 646 00:34:20,670 --> 00:34:21,587 Ready? 647 00:34:23,131 --> 00:34:24,590 Yeah. 648 00:34:28,136 --> 00:34:29,595 No fuckin' goodbyes. 649 00:34:30,680 --> 00:34:32,515 Besides, we all know I'm gonna be over there 650 00:34:32,557 --> 00:34:35,018 bugging the shit out of you in about an hour. 651 00:34:37,520 --> 00:34:40,064 I love you. 652 00:35:03,380 --> 00:35:04,714 Bye. 653 00:35:07,133 --> 00:35:09,052 Coming to Babylon? 654 00:35:09,636 --> 00:35:11,805 Got other plans. 655 00:35:11,930 --> 00:35:15,100 On Friday night in this nowhere burg, that would either be... 656 00:35:15,308 --> 00:35:17,936 counting your socks or going to synagogue. 657 00:35:17,894 --> 00:35:19,563 I've got patrol duty. 658 00:35:27,404 --> 00:35:29,406 As long as you're working the streets, 659 00:35:29,448 --> 00:35:33,160 you should try making a few bucks. 660 00:35:34,369 --> 00:35:36,538 Where'd you get that? 661 00:35:37,372 --> 00:35:41,627 Oh. One of these jerk-offs from the other day punched me. 662 00:35:41,668 --> 00:35:42,878 It's nothing. 663 00:35:43,504 --> 00:35:44,671 This time. 664 00:35:44,713 --> 00:35:46,632 I can fucking take care of myself. 665 00:35:46,673 --> 00:35:49,134 Well, how about, um, 666 00:35:49,176 --> 00:35:50,886 taking the night off? 667 00:35:50,928 --> 00:35:53,222 Even Rage and God get a day of rest. 668 00:35:53,263 --> 00:35:55,224 I told you, I have things to do. 669 00:35:55,266 --> 00:35:57,434 More like, going out looking for trouble. 670 00:35:58,519 --> 00:36:00,187 I'm not looking for anything. 671 00:36:00,229 --> 00:36:02,314 It comes looking for us. 672 00:36:02,314 --> 00:36:04,024 Motherfucking asshole straight guys 673 00:36:04,066 --> 00:36:05,526 think they can drive down the street, 674 00:36:05,568 --> 00:36:07,361 yell "faggot!" out of their car window, 675 00:36:07,403 --> 00:36:08,571 and we're just going to stand there and take it 676 00:36:08,612 --> 00:36:10,114 like a bunch of scared sissies. 677 00:36:10,156 --> 00:36:12,283 As far as I'm concerned, they can fucking die. 678 00:36:13,284 --> 00:36:15,536 I'm glad to hear you're not angry. 679 00:36:15,619 --> 00:36:17,538 We're protecting innocent people, 680 00:36:17,580 --> 00:36:19,290 standing up for ourselves. 681 00:36:19,332 --> 00:36:20,082 What's wrong with that? 682 00:36:39,977 --> 00:36:41,145 The professor joining us? 683 00:36:41,938 --> 00:36:44,232 Uh, he's working on his new book. 684 00:36:44,232 --> 00:36:46,401 He's almost done. I can't wait to read it. 685 00:36:46,442 --> 00:36:47,819 I think I'll wait for the movie. 686 00:36:49,070 --> 00:36:50,363 Is Justin coming? 687 00:36:50,405 --> 00:36:51,322 Maybe. 688 00:36:51,864 --> 00:36:55,618 I heard the pink posse came to the rescue last night. 689 00:37:01,082 --> 00:37:03,168 Hey, Em! 690 00:37:04,711 --> 00:37:06,296 Hello, Michael. 691 00:37:06,337 --> 00:37:07,297 How's it going? 692 00:37:07,338 --> 00:37:08,339 Just fine. 693 00:37:08,840 --> 00:37:10,383 You want to get a drink? 694 00:37:10,508 --> 00:37:12,385 No, thanks. 695 00:37:12,427 --> 00:37:14,262 Ramon and I are busy. 696 00:37:14,304 --> 00:37:16,097 Okay. Well, maybe later. 697 00:37:16,514 --> 00:37:19,309 Later, Ramon and I will be even busier. 698 00:37:19,684 --> 00:37:22,062 But, hey; why don't you call Ted? 699 00:37:22,103 --> 00:37:24,064 I'm sure he'd love to get a drink with you. 700 00:37:29,986 --> 00:37:31,822 Why don't you get us a couple beers? 701 00:37:44,167 --> 00:37:46,503 Oh. Do you mind if I cut in? 702 00:37:46,670 --> 00:37:48,797 I'm dancing with someone. 703 00:37:49,298 --> 00:37:49,923 Not any more. 704 00:37:49,965 --> 00:37:51,466 How dare you? 705 00:37:51,508 --> 00:37:53,051 Where the fuck do you get off? 706 00:37:53,093 --> 00:37:56,096 Save your diva routine for your world tour. 707 00:37:56,680 --> 00:37:57,765 Why'd you treat Michael like that? 708 00:37:57,806 --> 00:37:58,724 Like what? 709 00:37:58,766 --> 00:38:00,601 Like he's an insignificant piece of shit. 710 00:38:00,642 --> 00:38:02,728 What the fuck business is it of yours? 711 00:38:02,770 --> 00:38:05,230 Anybody who hurts Michael is the fuck my business. 712 00:38:05,272 --> 00:38:07,900 Yeah well, maybe he hurt me too. 713 00:38:08,108 --> 00:38:10,319 By being friends with Theodore? 714 00:38:12,071 --> 00:38:14,990 You are the one who told me to forget him, 715 00:38:15,658 --> 00:38:16,575 that... that he's dead. 716 00:38:16,617 --> 00:38:18,994 Right here on this very dance floor. 717 00:38:19,036 --> 00:38:20,704 Well, guess what? 718 00:38:20,746 --> 00:38:24,917 Like Jesus and Liza and Judy, he's making a comeback. 719 00:38:26,669 --> 00:38:30,089 And now everybody wants to give him a standing ovation, 720 00:38:30,131 --> 00:38:32,049 just like nothing ever happened. 721 00:38:32,091 --> 00:38:33,551 Listen to me, Honeycutt. 722 00:38:33,634 --> 00:38:35,511 Are you listening? 723 00:38:35,720 --> 00:38:38,139 Yes, I'm listening. 724 00:38:38,180 --> 00:38:40,808 And don't call me Honeycutt. 725 00:38:42,768 --> 00:38:45,438 Michael is your friend, just the same as he's Ted's. 726 00:38:45,480 --> 00:38:47,482 But if you force him to choose between you, 727 00:38:47,523 --> 00:38:48,649 you're going to lose him. 728 00:38:52,320 --> 00:38:54,030 Oh and, uh, by the way, 729 00:38:54,072 --> 00:38:55,865 I fucked Ramon. 730 00:38:55,990 --> 00:38:59,077 His dick's the size of a Ticonderoga #3 731 00:38:59,118 --> 00:39:02,705 after it's been sharpened. Sorry. 732 00:39:16,469 --> 00:39:18,638 There's not much happening tonight. 733 00:39:18,680 --> 00:39:21,015 You can't expect to kick ass every time. 734 00:39:21,391 --> 00:39:22,475 But last night... 735 00:39:22,517 --> 00:39:25,437 last night was the first time I was in a fight and won. 736 00:39:25,854 --> 00:39:28,481 For once, the fucking bullies ran away. 737 00:39:28,565 --> 00:39:30,650 Nothing like feeling a little power. 738 00:39:32,152 --> 00:39:34,112 But it might make things harder. 739 00:39:34,863 --> 00:39:36,740 Once they hear we're not afraid to fight back, 740 00:39:36,781 --> 00:39:39,075 they might not be so quick to come looking for us. 741 00:39:39,117 --> 00:39:41,244 So we'll just have to go looking for them. 742 00:39:41,578 --> 00:39:44,289 But I thought our job was to protect people here on the street. 743 00:39:44,331 --> 00:39:47,167 Sure. But why hang around Liberty Avenue 744 00:39:47,209 --> 00:39:48,210 waiting for something to happen, 745 00:39:48,251 --> 00:39:50,253 when there's a whole straight world out there? 746 00:39:50,295 --> 00:39:54,466 Let them see us and fear us in Jesus' name! 747 00:39:54,675 --> 00:39:56,927 W... what the fuck is that? 748 00:39:56,969 --> 00:39:58,929 Southern baptist bullshit. 749 00:39:58,971 --> 00:40:00,639 Every Wednesday and Sunday night, 750 00:40:00,681 --> 00:40:02,224 I'd be sitting there, listening to the preacher 751 00:40:02,266 --> 00:40:05,144 telling us how all homosexuals were going to burn in hell. 752 00:40:05,185 --> 00:40:07,479 And I'd be shitting in my pants, thinking, 753 00:40:07,521 --> 00:40:09,189 "What if the congregation found out?" 754 00:40:09,231 --> 00:40:11,024 I'd be kicked out. 755 00:40:11,692 --> 00:40:14,361 My parents would hate me, they'd never speak to me again. 756 00:40:15,070 --> 00:40:16,488 Is that what happened? 757 00:40:19,283 --> 00:40:22,453 Not before I fucked Hector Ramirez up the ass. 758 00:40:23,996 --> 00:40:24,955 So... 759 00:40:25,456 --> 00:40:28,667 what do you say we go flush us out some homophobes. 760 00:40:45,685 --> 00:40:48,771 I'll have what my friend is having. 761 00:40:48,813 --> 00:40:49,981 Sure. 762 00:40:59,991 --> 00:41:02,827 So I've been thinking about going blonde. 763 00:41:02,869 --> 00:41:06,330 The sort of silvery-platinum shade madonna was 764 00:41:06,372 --> 00:41:09,333 pre-"Blonde Ambition" post-"Dick Tracy". 765 00:41:12,503 --> 00:41:15,506 I think that's the worst fucking idea I've ever heard. 766 00:41:18,092 --> 00:41:21,012 I knew you would. 767 00:41:35,276 --> 00:41:37,821 When my dad used to take me bird hunting, 768 00:41:37,862 --> 00:41:40,490 the first thing we'd do to flush them out was beat the bushes. 769 00:41:40,782 --> 00:41:42,450 How do we do that? 770 00:41:42,701 --> 00:41:43,868 Like this. 771 00:41:43,952 --> 00:41:44,786 What... 772 00:41:44,828 --> 00:41:46,121 Come on. 773 00:41:54,713 --> 00:41:55,964 Christ! 774 00:41:55,088 --> 00:41:56,882 Excuse me? 775 00:41:56,923 --> 00:41:57,591 Huh? 776 00:41:58,258 --> 00:42:00,343 I thought you said something about my friend and me. 777 00:42:00,677 --> 00:42:02,679 Yeah, get a room. 778 00:42:03,805 --> 00:42:06,433 Do you have a problem, sir, with our kissing? 779 00:42:06,475 --> 00:42:08,060 No, you do. 780 00:42:08,101 --> 00:42:10,228 You're in the wrong part of town. 781 00:42:10,270 --> 00:42:12,522 So why don't you go back to where you belong? 782 00:42:13,941 --> 00:42:16,568 Last I heard, we were still living in a democracy. 783 00:42:16,610 --> 00:42:18,862 When did they pass out the pink triangles? 784 00:42:20,405 --> 00:42:21,865 Fuck off. 785 00:42:22,074 --> 00:42:24,493 You got a problem, asshole? 786 00:42:25,244 --> 00:42:27,621 I asked if you had a problem. 787 00:42:27,663 --> 00:42:30,541 Yeah. You fucking fags should all get AIDS and die! 788 00:42:30,582 --> 00:42:32,751 Someone else once said that to me. 789 00:44:15,272 --> 00:44:18,900 Moo!